An Open Letter To "That Guy"
Dear That Guy,
You know who you are ... the one that walks into the public restroom (washroom for my Canadian reader), looks around at all the empty urinals and decides to go for the one available stall instead. We know you're not thinking of "that other guy" (in this case me) who just drove 100mph off the freeway in search of the nearest restroom because he's sicker than sick. And when he gets in there, as if he wasn't in enough pain already, he has to stand there for 10 minutes and listen to you piss out the gallon of beer you drank the night before.
What is it about the toilet that you find so exceptional? Do you like the deeper sound? Maybe the thought of peeing next to other guys frightens you? Maybe you just got lost.
The point is Mr. "That Guy," please learn to love the urinal. They are there for a purpose and they work very well. I speak from experience. No one will make fun of the size of your penis. No one will laugh at how many times it takes you to shake off. In fact, no one will even notice you there ... because peeing in a urinal is normal. Normal in the sense that its courteous to the people who really need use of the toilet .. so that they may do just that ... when they need it.
So Mr. "That Guy," please, please, don't be "that guy." Or else just use this door next time:
